Mediation is a voluntary and private dispute resolution process, where the parties work with a neutral third party, known as a mediator, to reach an agreement on some or all issues in dispute.

Cost effective and Efficient: Unlike litigation, which is very expensive, lengthy, and filled with unexpected delays, mediation offers a cost-effecive and efficient method to resolve disputes.

Control and Tailored Solutions: Unlike in court, where a stranger (i.e. the judge) will make a decision about your family, in mediation the parties retain control over the outcome of their case. A judge has limited options in making an order, whereas mediation allows for unlimited creativity and a wide range of customized solutions.

Private and Confidential: Mediation is a private and confidential process. The conversations and ideas shared are “without prejudice” and cannot be used in court, and the settlement reached can be confidential if desired. In contrast, court proceedings and decisions are typically public.

Preserves relationships and healthy for children: Mediation can help the parties maintain a civil relationship and move forward peacefully. Litigation has been shown to have a devastating emotional impact on families, especially children. If children are involved, they will benefit tremendously from a settled parenting arrangement that provides certainty and security. According to clinical child psychologist, Joan B. Kelly, it is the level of parental conflict, as opposed to the divorce itself, which causes significant negative consequences for children. Negative consequences include psychological, emotional, social, and academic difficulties as well as an impact on brain development.

The mediator serves as a neutral third party, guiding the discussion and facilitating productive communication. Their role is not to take sides or advocate for either party but to help the parties navigate the negotiation process and reach a mutually agreeable resolution.

The mediator cannot provide legal advice or make a decision, but can help guide the parties towards settlement by discerning the parties’ true interests and assessing their legal positions and potential outcomes in court.

Initial Consult: The mediator will complete an initial consult with the parties to determine if the case is suitable for mediation and discuss the process (this does not apply if counsel is retained).

Intake Forms: Each party will complete a confidential intake form.

Pre-Mediation Meeting with the Parties and/or Counsel: The mediator will meet with each party separately (and if applicable, counsel) to discuss the case.

Mediation: The mediator offers virtual or in-person mediations. The parties may be in separate rooms (“shuttle mediation”) or together in a joint room (or a combination). The mediator will together with the parties and counsel decide what is suitable, depending on the circumstances of the case.

Gather Documents: Prepare to bring relevant documents to the mediation, such as financial disclosures, expert reports, appraisals, and pleadings.

Consult with/retain a lawyer: Consider retaining a lawyer to advise you during the mediation or, at a minimum, consult with a lawyer about your legal rights and obligations beforehand.

Consider your interests, concerns, and objectives: What is important to you? What are you worried about? What do you hope to achieve in the mediation?

Prepare to compromise: Mediation is not about winning, nor is it your day in court. Consider the cost of continuing to litigate, the peace of mind you’ll gain from resolving the dispute, and strive to reach an acceptable settlement that allows you to move forward.

Prioritize self-care: Any legal process is stressful. Take care of yourself before the mediation by resting and relaxing ahead of the big day.

Seek support: Feeling mentally supported before mediation is important. Consider reaching out to a counselor and/or lawyer, and share your feelings with close friends and family.

Melissa Salfi’s hourly rate for mediation is $380 plus tax. For a full day mediation, a retainer of $5,000 is required, with the final cost depending on the number of hours spent preparing for and attending the mediation. The cost is typically shared equally between the parties. Flat-rate mediations are available in specific circumstances.